well nobody responded to the last one

[Klank]

Sitting in the Command Central recliner in front of the tube one fine day watching Dos Grande el Jugos on the Mexican channel the new young medic (a male for a change) was rubbing his right heal over his left toe area on a pretty regular interval. After some time I asked him what gives? "Well being in these boots all day and sometimes most of the night, my toes get a little funky from time to time and I just can't seem to find anything that will take care of it for good"

 

"Well my boy" I state sitting up a little in my chair, "I to had a bout with Flight Foot Fungus and tried everything on the market, but to no avail" "My feet stunk worse than a day after the Super Bowl beer fart at a frat house and had toe jam so bad I had to scrape it out with a spoon"

 

Leaning over in his chair either to hear better or puke, he replies, "What on earth did you do?" "Well Son" I say as I push forward in the recliner placing my feet on the ground while looking to my right and to my left as not to be overheard by our nurse who was clucking on the phone to another nurse about another nurse "It was some time back, we had a weather front sitting right down on top of us, the ceiling was so low you had to duck to go outside" glancing once more to check on the nurse. "The crew got a call for a ground run on some poor soul and rode the truck for about five and a half hours"

 

He leans even farther over as my voice is getting softer and tilts his head as he hangs on every word. "I had never been here alone before and just wasn't sure what to do but I thought I better do something special for the occasion. First I went down to the convenience store and got me a couple two day old chilly dogs and a bladder buster of Mountain Dew, got back, kicked off my boots and chowed down. Shortly after that I was snoozing in the chair when I was awoken by the bubbling of my bowels"

 

At this point he leaned back up slightly and was probably wondering were the heck I was going with this, I motion to him with my hand to move closer as I say "Wait now, here comes the good part" He leans forward again "So there I was thinking it's time for a good old fashion 60 minute dump and what better place to take it than in the nurse's poofy smelling bathroom. Well I'm sitting there for oh about twenty minutes, I darn near broke the bowl with one of those big ol gay maker turds, the ones so big they leave stretch marks on the ol bung hole when my feet just got to itching more than I could stand"

 

Now he really starts to take notice, "Well anyway I used up what was left of the 4 ply on the roll (heck we got 1 ply in our bathroom) and I look under the sink for another roll to finish the job when I see this little case wide open and a tube of Vagisil laying right on top. I think to myself as I grab the new roll, well at least I'm not the only one with a little cheese factory going when it hit me"

 

His eyes are as big as saucers now, "I start to think, there are a lot of similarities in the area of operation, pretty much the same problem, I wonder. Well I tell you what, I finish up the other job and then I pulled off my socks and squeezed in a little between my toes, darn it didn't feel bad at all, as a matter of fact it felt pretty good"

 

He leans all the way back in disbelief, "I tell you what boy that's the best darn thing your ever going to find, if you don't believe me go into our bathroom and look in my shaving kit, go on and try it"

 

Well to make a short story long, now everybody at our base uses Vagisil, don't you wish you did?

 

Safe Flight

[flingwing206]

Nobody responds, because how can you, really?

 

Klank, you are the master of disaster! Everything I know about EMS I learned from you. ::potty::

[Wally]

I'm glad you've broadened your horizons a bit and started lying here, too. Sorta like the old "scared straight" program for wayward youths...

Kids, this could be you if you don't change your ways!