Helicopter sayings

[SuperSixOne]

I've heard quite a few different sayings about helicopters from the fixed wing guys, got any more?

 

- Everyone is a student in a helicopter

 

- If you push the stick forward, the houses get bigger. If you pull the stick back, they get smaller. Unless your in a helicopter, then you need to find another stick.

 

- Flying helicopters isn't more dangerous. Crashing them is what's dangerous, and it just happeneds more often.

 

- Helicopters don't fly; they vibrate so much and make so much noise that the earth rejects them.

 

- If God had meant man to fly helicopters, He'd have given him more money.

 

- A helicopter is a collection of rotating parts going around and around and reciprocating parts going up and down -- all of them trying to become random in motion. Right now.

 

- A fool and his money are soon flying more helicopter than he can handle.

 

- Gravity never loses. The best you can hope for is a draw.

 

- There are old pilots, and bold pilot, but no old bold pilots - heard this on on here

 

I'd like to hear your's

[FLHooker]

Here's a couple that I've heard

 

-Chinooks don't flly, they beat the air into submission

 

-Try not to get yourself into a Blew Blade situation... You know, where 1 blew this way, another blew that way... And if you do, push full right pedal and stare at the OAT gauge until impact

 

 

CHAD

[cptcoma]

People fly airplanes, pilots fly helicopters

[captkirkyota]

I've heard quite a few different sayings about helicopters from the fixed wing guys, got any more?

 

- Helicopters don't fly; they vibrate so much and make so much noise that the earth rejects them.

That's just the BEST!

[delorean]

Helicopter pilots always get it STRAIGHT UP!

[Guest rookie101]

Helicopter pilots always get it STRAIGHT UP!

 

A great 'add-on' to that one, and i've just read it not heard it, is helicopter pilots may get it up quick, but A&P's keep it up

[bqmassey]

The thing is, helicopters are different from planes. An airplane by it's nature wants to fly, and if not interfered with too strongly by unusual events or by a deliberately incompetent pilot, it will fly. A helicopter does not want to fly. It is maintained in the air by a variety of forces and controls working in opposition to each other, and if there is any disturbance in this delicate balance the helicopter stops flying; immediately and disastrously. There is no such thing as a gliding helicopter.

 

This is why being a helicopter pilot is so different from being an airplane pilot, and why in generality, airplane pilots are open, clear-eyed, buoyant extroverts and helicopter pilots are brooding introspective anticipators of trouble. They know if something bad has not happened it is about to.

Harry Reasoner

[Collective Down!]

Learning to hover is like standing on top of a greasy basketball, while patting your head and rubbing your stomach.

 

If the wings are travelling faster than the fuselage, it's probably a helicopter.... and therefor, unsafe.

 

and

 

My favorite (despite being an airplane driver) is: Runways are for beauty queens

 

 

There are a ton of them on the Midwest Helicopters site:

http://www.flymidwest.com/HumorWisdom.html

[500E]

The pilot that says watch me!! is the one not to fly with

[heligirl03]

A mile of road takes you nowhere, a mile of runway takes you elsewhere, a helicopter takes you anywhere.

 

Once you have flown you will walk the Earth with your eyes turned skyward, for there you have been, there you long to return.

Edited June 26, 2007 by heligirl03

[Fly for food]

"The only time you have too much fuel - is when you are on fire."

 

"If you want to get somewhere learn to fly a plane, if you want a job flying learn to fly a helicopter"

 

fo S76/s92/aw139 drivers etc: "kick the tires and light the fires..."

 

"Any landing you walk away from is a good landing"

 

"It doesn't matter how many takeoffs and landings you log each day - so long as they match each other in number"

 

+ 1 old joke:

 

"Whats the difference between a helicopter and it's pilot?"

answer: "the helicopter stops whining when it finishes work!"

 

FFF

[Flip]

"Airplanes resemble birds. Helicopters resemble bug-like creatures from a sci-fi movie."

 

"In a helicopter, a sprague clutch is not a sprained rotor, although that would be an airplane pilot's first guess."

 

Haha, good topic.

[SuperSixOne]

[PA Pilot]

The last six inches of a landing in a Robinson are like trying to land on a beach ball.

 

The more moving parts, the safer I feel.

[Hedge36]

One very simple rule I grew up with and still stick to:

 

Never fly wearing anything you wouldn't want to hike in.

[heligirl03]

I love this thread. More, more!!

[Stroh]

"A helicopter is five thousand moving parts trying to do you bodily harm"

I have heard this from every fixed wing pilot I ever met. Go figure...

[Optigirl]

Never stand in a shadow thats getting bigger.

 

Never get into a helicopter that isnt leaking hydrolic fluid.

[toad]

Never stand in a shadow thats getting bigger.

 

Never get into a helicopter that isnt leaking hydrolic fluid.

 

 

 

 

 

These are HILARIOUS!!!! Good on ya...Great way to end a day

 

 

TOAD

[permison]

"A helicopter is five thousand moving parts trying to do you bodily harm"

I have heard this from every fixed wing pilot I ever met. Go figure...

 

What is a helicopter formation?

 

Any two helicopters traveling in the same genral direction on a given day.

[ADRidge]

a male (helicopter) pilot is a confused soul who talks about women when he's flying, and flying when he's with women.

[BillyBob]

When I used to fly an aircraft the wouldn't fly with out hydraulics:

 

My four favorite parts are in this order:

1. The Big Fan (main rotor)

2. The Little Fan (t/r)

3. Power Steering (hydraulics - absolutely needed in the aircraft)

4. The Noise Maker(s). (engines)

The others are negotiable and we don't have to work as hard to survive.

 

This won't fit for 'FLHooker' cuz he needs both rotors....which reminds me:

 

"A Chinook - Two palm trees flying around in a dumpster trying to copulate"

 

Part of my old preflight briefing:

'If we crash and I am moving - Follow Me. If I'm not moving, take me with you.'

 

Advice given to me by an old pilot:

"If the button is Red, Yellow and Black Striped, or Dusty - DO NOT Touch It! If you DO push a button and it does something you don't want it to or the other pilot starts squealing, Push it again - Fast."

 

For the old A model Apache. "Power down and reboot- repeat as necessary."

Edited August 31, 2007 by BillyBob

[ErOk_OnE]

Runway?!? Who needs a runway!

[Optigirl]

As an helicopter pilot, one of two bad things can happen to you and one of them will happen:

a. One day you will walk out to the helicopter knowing that it is your last flight.

b. One day you will walk out to the helicopter not knowing that it is your last flight.

-

Before each flight, make sure that your bladder is empty and your fuel tanks are full!

-

Forget all that stuff about lift, gravity, thrust and drag. An helicopter flys because of money!

-

After dying in a helicopter crash, three air ambulance crewmembers find themselves at an orientation to enter heaven. Each one was asked, "When you are in your casket, what would you like to hear your friends and family saying about you?" Sean says, "I would like to hear them say I was a great medic and a great family man." Karl says, "I would like to hear them say I was a wonderful husband and an excellent pilot who made a difference."

 

The copilot says, "I would like to hear them say, 'Look! He's moving!'"

-

[pilot129]

My flight instructor had one last piece of advice before my first solo, "Try to keep the greasy side down."

 

How do you know that there's a helicopter pilot at a party? Don't worry, he'll tell you.

 

How is a helicopter (insert least favorite model or type of flying here) like a cactus? On a cactus the pricks are on the outside...

 

Landings are mandatory, take-offs are optional.

 

Is everything that you need to survive anything that you are flying over attached to your body? Because if it's not and you crash, you'll have the rest of your life to wish it was.