March 2020 Board

[Ewoski]

1 hour ago, Jakelsx said:

Age: 24

Gt Score: 120

SIFT: 52

APFT: 256

Education: Bachelors degree in Finance 3.2 GPA

LOR: CW5 Apache Pilot, CW4 Black Hawk Pilot, 0-5 Black Hawk Pilot, Professor from College

Physical: Stamped

Waivers: None

Just got the update from the recruiter for the March Board was a NS first board, What do you guys recommend for July board any correction updates are due June 15th ?

The only thing that’s changeable that you posted was your APFT. I don’t know if you’d be able to get another one in before corrections but you can try.

also, post your essay maybe it could use some extra eyes on it

 

thats all I can think of

[Jakelsx]

18 minutes ago, Ewoski said:

The only thing that’s changeable that you posted was your APFT. I don’t know if you’d be able to get another one in before corrections but you can try.

also, post your essay maybe it could use some extra eyes on it

 

thats all I can think of

My Current Essay, Any feed back on what to add or change will be greatly appreciated.

My entire life I have struggled to find my purpose, my defining career path; the question that runs through everyone’s mind growing up: what do I want to do? Being an individual who enjoys the rush and the exhilarating feeling of going fast or being hundreds of feet off the ground, becoming an aviator for the United States Army can satisfy just that. By becoming a Warrant Officer, I will be able to become a true professional in the aviation field. The notion of having an office space surrounded by various gauges and controls and has the capability to fly, is truly an opportunity that I must make a reality, and by becoming a Warrant Officer I can do just that. Never have I wanted a mediocre office job or to be the person on the sidelines; I wanted to be the one making choices, making decisions that would benefit and make positive change to successors in my field. I have always maintained a high level of motivation and determination in anything I’ve done, but always questioned my purpose in what it was I was doing. By becoming an Army Aviator, I will have purpose; a purpose to focus my motivation and determination to carve out my defining career path as a pilot.

            Throughout my entire job and academic career, I have possessed a disciplined and industrious work ethic that has propelled me to attain my Bachelor’s degree in Finance from the University of Texas at El Paso. The level of commitment that I have set for myself has conveyed my true capabilities and skills, both as an individual and what I can bring to others. From working at the age of 17, to the two days in three years I called into work, or the 22 credit hours of college and 30 hours of work a week I tasked myself in one semester; my drive and grit is one that can only be matched with the rigor and focus that is required by an Army Aviator. Along with my work ethic, my ability to lead with steadfast tenacity has allowed me to excel not only in school, but in the workplace. Becoming an Army Aviator will give me the chance to bring forth my skills to a community that I would greatly enjoy being a part of.

            Given the opportunity to be a part of the Warrant Officer and aviation community and culture means the world to me; I have never worked harder towards anything than this. My discipline, commitment, integrity, communication, drive and leadership are just some of the things that I can bring into becoming an Army Aviator. I welcome challenges and difficulty with open arms and my ability to persevere through adversity has proven my resilience in failure and accomplishment in success. If granted the opportunity to become an aviator in the United States Army, I know that I would not only be an excellent pilot, but a leader who takes initiative, and has both ambition and integrity. I hope that you see the potential and the skill set that I can bring and help me further my success in fulfilling my true purpose by becoming an Army Aviator. Thank you for your time and consideration in this important matter.

 

[BattlingGravity]

Hey, I just ran across your essay.  I'm not a Warrant or a military pilot- just another hopeful- but I've had to evaluate essays and summary sheets for people applying to positions within the military before.  Yours could likely use some refinement.  DISCLAIMER:  I'm just another 153A applicant, and speaking only from my experience reviewing other packages for other things within the military.

Your first paragraph is more "I want a cool job, and this is how being a WO will make me happy".  I'd probably nuke it and start over.  You want to show that you're passionate, but not just about the fun part.  What about the mission?  (Side note- be familiar with the Army Aviation mission and what it means to a soldier on the ground) Sure, being an aviator will satisfy YOUR purpose, but will it do anything for the Army?  Focus more  on the professionalism aspect rather than the "surrounded by various gauges" part.  That wording in particular makes it sound like you have only the foggiest idea what's involved in flying- only that it sounds cooler than what you're doing now.

You second paragraph is better- but it doesn't set you apart.  Lots of applicants have a degree- what was your GPA?  What makes it stand apart from other applicants?  It's good that you have it, but if I were reading this to hire you it doesn't stand out.  Why did you get a degree?  You want to show that you've made good choices in the past, even if they aren't part of your current path.  Your college credits and work ethic are good- but you're saying that the only thing as hard as what you've done is being an Army Aviator.  It doesn't read well as a career military member, most of whom have probably done a few things that are difficult. You talk about being able to lead, but you provide no examples.  Did you play sports, do you supervise or manage people, do you do any volunteer work that shows you're a team player? Include it!  You again finish by saying you'd like to be an Army Aviator, but nothing about a desire to contribute to that community.  

The first sentence of your third paragraph doesn't quite make sense.  You're hitting a ton of buzzwords, but you're not connecting them to you.  Anyone can type those things- you need to tell the board how you show those things.   What challenges do you welcome with open arms? How have you shown your perseverance?  What accomplishments have proven your success?  You also flip flop between tones- 

"I know that I would not only be an excellent pilot, but a leader who takes initiative, and has both ambition and integrity."  -bold, probably a little to bold.  "I hope that you see the potential and the skill set that I can bring" -weirdly passive, doesn't read as being confident. "and help me further my success in fulfilling my true purpose by becoming an Army Aviator." -Again, you're making it all about you rather than about being of service.  I'd nuke the last sentence as well, but that's just me.  There are other ways to carry a polite and respectful tone.  

From your stats that you posted, you're a non-prior service civilian applicant.  You need to work on reinforcing that you're seeking to servel Not only to embody the values of an Army Aviator, but also as a Soldier.   

Sometimes, less is more.  You want what you write to be impactful rather than verbose and flowery.  That doesn't mean dumb it down, but don't try and fluff it up with buzzwords.  Anyone who does military hiring can read right through that and at the very least, it's annoying. 

Good luck, and hopefully someone who knows more specifics about 153A essays can chime in. 

[Jakelsx]

10 hours ago, BattlingGravity said:

Hey, I just ran across your essay.  I'm not a Warrant or a military pilot- just another hopeful- but I've had to evaluate essays and summary sheets for people applying to positions within the military before.  Yours could likely use some refinement.  DISCLAIMER:  I'm just another 153A applicant, and speaking only from my experience reviewing other packages for other things within the military.

Your first paragraph is more "I want a cool job, and this is how being a WO will make me happy".  I'd probably nuke it and start over.  You want to show that you're passionate, but not just about the fun part.  What about the mission?  (Side note- be familiar with the Army Aviation mission and what it means to a soldier on the ground) Sure, being an aviator will satisfy YOUR purpose, but will it do anything for the Army?  Focus more  on the professionalism aspect rather than the "surrounded by various gauges" part.  That wording in particular makes it sound like you have only the foggiest idea what's involved in flying- only that it sounds cooler than what you're doing now.

You second paragraph is better- but it doesn't set you apart.  Lots of applicants have a degree- what was your GPA?  What makes it stand apart from other applicants?  It's good that you have it, but if I were reading this to hire you it doesn't stand out.  Why did you get a degree?  You want to show that you've made good choices in the past, even if they aren't part of your current path.  Your college credits and work ethic are good- but you're saying that the only thing as hard as what you've done is being an Army Aviator.  It doesn't read well as a career military member, most of whom have probably done a few things that are difficult. You talk about being able to lead, but you provide no examples.  Did you play sports, do you supervise or manage people, do you do any volunteer work that shows you're a team player? Include it!  You again finish by saying you'd like to be an Army Aviator, but nothing about a desire to contribute to that community.  

The first sentence of your third paragraph doesn't quite make sense.  You're hitting a ton of buzzwords, but you're not connecting them to you.  Anyone can type those things- you need to tell the board how you show those things.   What challenges do you welcome with open arms? How have you shown your perseverance?  What accomplishments have proven your success?  You also flip flop between tones- 

"I know that I would not only be an excellent pilot, but a leader who takes initiative, and has both ambition and integrity."  -bold, probably a little to bold.  "I hope that you see the potential and the skill set that I can bring" -weirdly passive, doesn't read as being confident. "and help me further my success in fulfilling my true purpose by becoming an Army Aviator." -Again, you're making it all about you rather than about being of service.  I'd nuke the last sentence as well, but that's just me.  There are other ways to carry a polite and respectful tone.  

From your stats that you posted, you're a non-prior service civilian applicant.  You need to work on reinforcing that you're seeking to servel Not only to embody the values of an Army Aviator, but also as a Soldier.   

Sometimes, less is more.  You want what you write to be impactful rather than verbose and flowery.  That doesn't mean dumb it down, but don't try and fluff it up with buzzwords.  Anyone who does military hiring can read right through that and at the very least, it's annoying. 

Good luck, and hopefully someone who knows more specifics about 153A essays can chime in. 

Thank You! will definitely be writing a new draft here, you input is greatly appreciated!  

[Thedude]

15 hours ago, Jakelsx said:

My Current Essay, Any feed back on what to add or change will be greatly appreciated.

….

 

 

The only quantifiable stuff in your essay is that you have a bachelors degree with one heavy semester and got a job at 17 years old. That's something you have in common with about 1/3 of the US population. You need to actually tell the board what makes you better than other people, not that you've done the same thing as the rest of the applicants but really want a cool job.

[Mrhoodhimself07]

2 hours ago, Thedude said:

The only quantifiable stuff in your essay is that you have a bachelors degree with one heavy semester and got a job at 17 years old. That's something you have in common with about 1/3 of the US population. You need to actually tell the board what makes you better than other people, not that you've done the same thing as the rest of the applicants but really want a cool job.

This is the reason that posting your essay on this website is beneficial. Real feedback, instead of your boss saying, “yeah man sounds good.” However, I believe there is a forum specifically for an essay review, but I could be mistaken. 

[Ampdddd]

Best of luck everyone. Tomorrow begins the week of slow days turning into even slower days as we wait for the results! ...again. Lol

[Mrhoodhimself07]

24 minutes ago, Ampdddd said:

Best of luck everyone. Tomorrow begins the week of slow days turning into even slower days as we wait for the results! ...again. Lol

Hah that’s been all week for me. I was not aware the results were a week after the board. 

[Sgetti5]

[Travis3311]

Is this street to seat or AD? Or both? 

[Wndrman]

25 minutes ago, Sgetti5 said:

Oof

[Mrhoodhimself07]

That is just street to seat. The sum of the names on that memo equals those exact numbers. 

[Crash7051]

Wow thanks for posting that. That’s not the same stats my recruiter told me. This gives me a little more hope now. 
 

edit- is that for the March or May board? Or are they combined ?

[Mrhoodhimself07]

2 hours ago, Crash7051 said:

Wow thanks for posting that. That’s not the same stats my recruiter told me. This gives me a little more hope now. 
 

edit- is that for the March or May board? Or are they combined ?

This was a combined board. 

[nil5038]

Got selected! first look! Idk if you guys have seen my prior post but this sh*t has been a huge uphill battle just getting my package in. Service transfer, one exception to policy request, recruiters in three separate states... huge battle. Keep fighting guys

[BR3Y3S]

3 minutes ago, nil5038 said:

Got selected! first look! Idk if you guys have seen my prior post but this sh*t has been a huge uphill battle just getting my package in. Service transfer, one exception to policy request, recruiters in three separate states... huge battle. Keep fighting guys

Congrats! How did you find out? I haven't seen a MILPER drop yet, and I've probably refreshed the page like a million times today haha

[nil5038]

1 minute ago, BR3Y3S said:

Congrats! How did you find out? I haven't seen a MILPER drop yet, and I've probably refreshed the page like a million times today haha

Just got an email with an letter of acceptance memo from someone over at knox

[BR3Y3S]

2 minutes ago, nil5038 said:

Just got an email with an letter of acceptance memo from someone over at knox

Your results would've been included in street to seat, no? Not on the active duty side huh. 

[nil5038]

Yep. I wouldve assumed AD would hear even earlier than us. Easier to reach

[BR3Y3S]

1 minute ago, nil5038 said:

Yep. I wouldve assumed AD would hear even earlier than us. Easier to reach

I don't think we will hear anything until at least Wednesday. I was hopeful that the March board results would've dropped last week but I guess they really made it into an all-in-one board. 

[nil5038]

On 5/30/2020 at 9:16 PM, Wndrman said:

Oof

whats oof about this? is that a high acceptance %?

[Alice'sRestaurant]

I was notified today that I was selected as a civilian! Thanks to everyone on this forum and on this thread in particular - you all have been a great help!

 

[BR3Y3S]

1 minute ago, Alice'sRestaurant said:

I was notified today that I was selected as a civilian! Thanks to everyone on this forum and on this thread in particular - you all have been a great help!

 

Awesome news! Congrats!

[Mrhoodhimself07]

1 hour ago, BR3Y3S said:

I don't think we will hear anything until at least Wednesday. I was hopeful that the March board results would've dropped last week but I guess they really made it into an all-in-one board. 

I spoke with a CW4 in Warrant Recruiting, she said no later than the 12th. I’ll just set my sights on then. 

[BR3Y3S]

17 minutes ago, Mrhoodhimself07 said:

I spoke with a CW4 in Warrant Recruiting, she said no later than the 12th. I’ll just set my sights on then. 

I'm not an expert in how this whole process actually works (especially considering we are in a weird circumstance) but I can't see how it would take two weeks to compile results and publish a MILPER...but who knows.